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The Power Of Words In Motherhood

In my mompreneur life, I have to play with words to craft a corporate identity… tag lines, mission statements, web copy, articles, blog posts, books, and marketing messaging.

In my mommy life, I must clearly and lovingly discuss principles that will shape my daughters’ lives.

Communicating my feelings effectively is the key to all my relationships with others. 

The right words ALWAYS make a difference in business and in life in general. Whether it is self talk, written or spoken communication, words have the power to heal or hurt, inspire or put down, unite or divide, show love or hate, influence for better or for worse…

Yesterday, my friend and business partner sent me this video and, after crying and being overwhelmed with gratitude, I decided to share it with you all. Enjoy!

I have always been a word-geek. At a very early age, I made money writing letters for my classmates and older kids in my school. I cashed in on my penmanship and my ability to write apology letters, love letters, like letters, don’t wanna be friends anymore letters, can we be friends letters, motivational letters and even confrontational letters.

My favorite game of all times was a made up word game, and my brother and I even made up our own crossword puzzles.

I love reading and writing, but boy do I love to talk, too! I am just a little big cheerleader of self’-expression!

With that being said, I have a confession to make. It is so disturbing sometimes to hear some express their feelings.

In Spanish, we have many ways to say “I love you” and each denotes a different level of closeness and commitment, as well as the type of loving relationship you have with that person ― whether it is romantic love, lust, or friendly admiration, for example.

In English, we “love” eating, going to the movies, our job,  a sport, a color, a brand, our children, and our significant other. Some of those statements have completely different universes of intention and meaning…

How is one to know  how and how much we are loved?

Use “I” Statements.  I am not moved by “sorry“, “miss you” and “love you”  ―  they just don’t sound heartfelt to me. When you say “I am sorry”, you are both owning and expressing your emotions.

Expand. To add meaning to words, add more words! lol It makes a difference to hear exactly what someone loves or appreciates about me or the specific value I bring to their life.

Act. They say actions speak louder than words. They are right. I believe when Mahatma Gandhi said “Action Expresses Priorities”  and when my friend (and cherished student) Egide Thein perfectly stated “the most often expressed priority is inaction” they were both talking about “LOVE” as a verb.

Did is a word of achievement,
Won’t is a word of retreat.
Might is a word of bereavement,
Can’t is a word of defeat.
Ought is a word of duty,
Try is a word each hour.
Will is a word of beauty,
Can is a word of power.

I found this poem during my morning reading routine and it got me to thinking about how words manifest our deepest intentions, thoughts, plans and desires.

In carefully choosing our words, we are becoming more aware of what intentions we are holding, which will ultimately influence our actions, our habits, our outcomes.

WARNING! Dangerous Words ~ Keep Away! Click here for a list of words I find “negative” and encourage myself, my children, and everyone to avoid.

Do our words sound meaningful and clear?
Do our actions reflect  that a sport, game, activity, job, social group, or meal as our priority?


Positive Motivation and Negative Motivation: What drives you? ★ Elayna Fernandez ~ The Positive MOM ♥

Wednesday 5th of October 2016

[…] The Passion Test, I ask them to write a set of statements that describe their ideal life using positive words. It is so difficult for most, because most of us focus on what we want to avoid. Low-frequency, […]

Sandy Wamble

Monday 18th of April 2011

I really love this blog, it reminds me to quiet my mind, to get rid of the "Stinking Thinking" as Pastor Henry Wright of Pleasant Valley Ministries puts it. I believe it takes not only faith, but much practice to stay in the positive frame of spirit, body, mind and soul. We can either profess health and wealth or not, the choice is really up to you. But what you say and how you say it, will affect those around you; it will be positive or negative. Thank you again for opening my eyes and taming my tongue!

Yvonne Kurtz

Friday 15th of April 2011

So true, especially the words we speak to ourselves.

Prov 18:21 “Death and life are in the power of the tongue…”

Prov 12:18 “... the tongue of the wise promotes health.”

Sandy Wamble

Friday 15th of April 2011

Elayna, thank you for this profound video, it has given me much to think about my thoughts, words and actions. Thank you! Our words either kill and destroy or they are full of life and heal.

Allana Cardenas

Thursday 14th of April 2011

Beautiful......helped me reflect my outlook for many things, as well as, how i use my words!