Even though I often say time passes way too quickly when you’re raising little ones, life before I had kids seems like a blur.
My earlier self was wild, crazy, and carefree. I would go out dancing all night long in my 5” high heels, exclusively drinking water – of course! Motherhood causes you to shift your priorities and place your focus exclusively on these precious creatures that are now in your care.
Something I really liked doing was going to concerts. I have always loved music; it’s a passion I inherited from my dad that I haven’t really seen present in my life for sometime, other than going on YouTube to play old songs I really love.
Today’s music doesn’t really appeal to me. I stopped listening to the radio in my car, because there’s so much profanity, objectifying, and “eat, drink, and be merry” philosophy mixed in with the good, edifying, and heart-based songs. It brings to mind a photo I saw once of a delicious-looking ice cream with a roach on top; it read: “it’s good, except for the bad parts.”
It’s all about BALANCE.
If you think long enough, there’s always a way to fulfill your needs, and follow your passions. Sometimes it’s staring at you, or right under your nose.
And sometimes, you just need to get out of the house. Not to a conference, or to a meeting, or to go shopping, or even to the spa, but to remind yourself that you are still the woman you once were, and that a mom’s night out is not just nice, but necessary.
[Tweet “Balance is not something you find, #balance is something you create. #motivationformoms”]
When you’re home, where you are only ever called “mom,” “mommy,” or “mama,” there’s always something talking to you. The dishes scream “clean me,” the laundry begs “wash me,” the floors plead “vacuum me.” There’s always some kind of chore that needs to be done, and because you’re so amazing, someone always needs you, someone’s always tugging on your shirt, or hanging from your leg.
Last weekend, I decided to not let the mommy guilt get the best of me and to accept Hampton by Hilton’s invitation to go to Live Nation’s Ricky Martin concert at the Gexa Energy Pavilion in Dallas, about 45 minutes away from home. They gifted me two tickets, so I invited my friend Janette to go with me.
I couldn’t believe I was actually having a “mom’s night out.” I sang, I danced, and we had a great time chatting and being silly together. I think we often underestimate how important it is to have an adult conversation. Let me clarify: an uninterrupted adult conversation.
I always loved Ricky Martin when I was a little girl. I was a Menudo fan, but what little girl wasn’t? The boys were cute, the music was catchy, and it was the trend of the times. I saved up money from my entrepreneurial endeavors to buy all kinds of school supplies with the boys’ faces on it. I knew the lyrics to all the songs. I knew the dance steps, too!
In the 90’s, when Ricky was all grown and I in college, he released an amazing album (in Spanish) that I still hold dear to my heart. I love every song in that CD. When he performed my favorite song from that album last weekend, I was in heaven. I shared my crazy rendition with my followers and viewers on Periscope, too. It was definitely a great night.
Having this experience, also gave me the opportunity to bond with my daughters. As they start their teen years, I think it’s easier to relate to mom when mom tells the stories of her youth. It’s healthy for girls to know mom had crushes, dreams, interests, and even more importantly, made mistakes.
While I was dancing to “She Bangs” and “Livin’ La Vida Loca,” my littles enjoyed a night at the park with dad. A mom’s night out can be a blessing for everyone. They need a break from mom, too.
Being a mom is only one of the stages of being a woman, and I must admit, although it can probably be one of the most stressful, it is also one of the most rewarding, because you learn to be vulnerable, and vulnerability is the foundation of connection, intimacy, and love.
Being away from the kids is a great way to get perspective because I miss them so much when I am gone. And believe it or not, they appreciate me more, too. At the end of the day, there is nowhere we’d all rather be than with each other.
I am grateful that Hampton by Hilton provided me with the concert tickets, as part of their initiative to inspire people to seize the weekend. It did give me a little push to embrace the woman I sometimes forget I am, and take some time to enjoy myself.
With this experience, I am reminded that balance is not something you find, it’s something you create through intentional choice.
When you feel like a wreck, or like you’re due for a break, invest in your peace of mind for the sake of your own sanity (and your family member’s).
When was the last time you had a mom’s night out? I’d love any tips you may have or a list of wholesome recreational activities you recommend. Love you!